The Heart Attack Murder Burger

Food ?? Comments Tue 09 December 2014

Some time last week, a routine visit by Thomas to our office deviated slightly from discussion of our projects to where we can get an authentic Okinawan breakfast (a topic brought on by our recent escapade to Jakkapoes pancakes.)

Whilst we didn't learn much in terms of Okinawan breakfast custom ("Okinawan breakfast? Hmm, I'm not sure if breakfast is really a thing here. Although, the Kafuu Beach Resort does a wonderful breakfast buffet!"), a local burger shop was mentioned, known for it's delightfully healthy sounding Heart Attack Murder Burgerâ„¢ (or HAMB).

Sold on the name alone, Michael and I made the trek down to Burger Shop H&S (aka Healthy & Smiles!) to engage in battle with this formidable sounding foe.


A nice little shack


So unassuming compared to what lies within


I present to you: the Burger Shop Healthy & Smiles Heart Attack Murder Burger. It was beautiful.

And formidable it was; we spent our time sizing it up, working out the best attack strategy. Eventually Michael opted for a knife and fork as his weapons, a wise move. For my sense of pride was too strong, and, determined to treat this monstrosity like the burger it was, I opted to use my hands and attempted to unhinge my jaw to grotesque angles.


Michael assessing the situation

It suffices to say this did not go as smoothly as anticipated, and I continued my attack from here on in with ample cutlery reserves.





Unfortunately we came nowhere near finishing the HAMB within the four minute competition limit, but I'd say we did a pretty good job (Michael finished in about 8 minutes, compared to maybe 15 minutes for me).

And as much as we'd like to think we defeated the Heart Attack Murder Burger, the truth is, it probably won in the long run. After waddling back to OIST, I didn't end up eating again until lunch time the next day.

So, hey, at least I got my moneys worth?

Tags: japan okinawa